Top 100 Funny Wedding Speeches¶
"Laughter is the shortest distance between two people." - Victor Borge
Wedding speeches can often be a mix of emotions, but a touch of humor can make them memorable and enjoyable for everyone. Here’s a compilation of the top 100 funny wedding speeches that will leave your audience in stitches, yet touch their hearts.
Topics¶
Overview¶
- Title: "Funny Wedding Speeches: Adding Humor to the Big Day"
- Subtitle: "A Collection of Hilarious Toasts"
- Tagline: "Laughter is the shortest distance between two people."
- Description: "A curated list of the funniest wedding speeches to entertain and engage guests while celebrating the newlyweds."
- Keywords: wedding, speeches, funny, humor, toasts, jokes, wedding reception, bride, groom, best man, maid of honor
Cheat¶
# Funny Wedding Speeches
- Adding Humor to the Big Day
- A Collection of Hilarious Toasts
- Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
- 5 Topics
## Topics
- Best Man Speeches: jokes, stories, humor, roasts, laughs
- Maid of Honor Speeches: funny, anecdotes, laughter, love, friendship
- Father of the Bride Speeches: humor, wisdom, jokes, stories, advice
- Groom Speeches: funny, heartfelt, jokes, love, humor
- General Wedding Toasts: jokes, laughter, stories, fun, humor
Topic 1: "Best Man Speeches"¶
"Roasting the groom, one joke at a time."
Best man speeches are often the highlight of wedding receptions. They provide an opportunity to roast the groom with hilarious anecdotes and jokes, all while celebrating the bond between friends.
- "Ladies and gentlemen, I’m here to talk about the groom. And since he specifically asked me to keep it short, here’s my speech in three words: ‘Congratulations, you’re doomed!’"
- "I’ve known the groom since we were kids, and I can tell you one thing for sure: he’s not as smart as he looks. Luckily, his bride is here to help him with the hard stuff, like finding his shoes."
- "The groom and I have been through a lot together. So much, in fact, that when he asked me to be his best man, I couldn’t help but think, ‘Well, this makes up for all the bail money I’ve spent on him.’"
- "Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade."
- "Here’s to the groom: A man who’s won one woman’s heart and lost so many arguments to get there."
- "I asked the groom what he wanted from me today. He said, ‘Just don’t mention that time in Vegas.’ Well, sorry, buddy, I think we all know what happened in Vegas...stays on the internet forever."
- "They say marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning."
- "To the groom: Before you got married, you were incomplete. Now you’re finished."
- "The groom told me that he’s the boss in his house. And he has his wife’s permission to say so."
- "Here’s to love, laughter, and happily ever after. And if that doesn’t work out, remember: you can always blame the best man for everything."
Topic 2: "Maid of Honor Speeches"¶
"Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor."
Maid of honor speeches are a beautiful blend of love, friendship, and a few laughs. These speeches often highlight the unique bond between the bride and her best friend.
- "They say a good friend knows all your best stories. A best friend has lived them with you. But today, I promise to keep the embarrassing ones to myself."
- "Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband."
- "To the bride: I’ve seen you grow from a fun-loving girl to a beautiful woman. And to the groom: Good luck with that."
- "Behind every successful man is a woman rolling her eyes."
- "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!"
- "Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener."
- "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy."
- "They say opposites attract. Well, that’s certainly true for the bride and her love of punctuality, and the groom’s love of being fashionably late."
- "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in."
- "Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life."
Topic 3: "Father of the Bride Speeches"¶
"Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor."
Father of the bride speeches can be both touching and humorous, often combining a lifetime of wisdom with light-hearted jokes.
- "As the father of the bride, I’ve prepared myself for this day for years. I’ve practiced my ‘not tearing up’ face in the mirror, but clearly, I still need more practice."
- "When my daughter was little, I told her stories about princesses finding their prince. Today, I get to see her with her very own."
- "They say a daughter may outgrow your lap, but she’ll never outgrow your heart. And a father’s most important job is to keep her husband in line."
- "To my new son-in-law: Remember, if you ever need a place to hide, you’re always welcome in my basement."
- "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it."
- "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering."
- "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree."
- "They say a good marriage is like a casserole: Only those responsible for it really know what goes in it."
- "To the groom: I’ve been watching you for a while, and I think you’ll make a great husband. Just remember, I’m always watching."
- "To my daughter: You’ve grown into an amazing woman. And to my new son-in-law: Treat her well, or you’ll have me to answer to."
Topic 4: "Groom Speeches"¶
"Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time."
Groom speeches are a blend of heartfelt sentiments and humor, showing love and appreciation for the bride while entertaining the guests.
- "Today, I married my best friend. I also married someone who will correct me when I’m wrong and remind me of it when I think I’m right."
- "Marriage is not about finding someone you can live with, but finding someone you can’t live without. And someone who won’t mind putting up with your weird habits."
- "They say a successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. Let’s start our first fall with a honeymoon."
- "To my bride: I knew you were the one when you laughed at my jokes. To everyone else: I’m still working on you."
- "They say the key to a happy marriage is to always admit you’re wrong. So, to my wife: You’re always right."
- "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves."
- "I promise to always be your biggest fan, your toughest critic, and the one who laughs at your jokes, even the bad ones."
- "To my wife: You make me a better person every day. And to our guests: Don’t worry, I won’t let her change too much."
- "I’ve always believed that a happy wife equals a happy life. Here’s to a lifetime of happiness."
- "To my wife: Thank you for making me the luckiest man in the world. And to our guests: Please drink enough to forget the embarrassing stories you heard today."
Topic 5: "General Wedding Toasts"¶
"Bringing laughter and joy to all."
General wedding toasts are often given by friends and family, aiming to celebrate the couple with humor and heartfelt wishes.
- "Here’s to love and laughter and happily ever after."
- "Marriage is like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park."
- "To the couple: May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever."
- "Here’s to the bride who’s found her groom, and to the groom who’s found his doom."
- "To love, laughter, and a happily ever after. And if that doesn’t work, here’s to a prenup."
- "To the newlyweds: May your love be like a fine wine, getting better with age."
- "To the bride and groom: Remember, the secret to a happy marriage remains a secret."
- "Here’s to the bride: May she share everything with her husband, including the housework."
- "To the happy couple: May your love be as endless as your wedding speech."
- "To the groom: May you always have the last word in every argument. As long as it’s ‘Yes, dear.’"
Top 100 List¶
- "Ladies and gentlemen, I’m here to talk about the groom. And since he specifically asked me to keep it short, here’s my speech in three words: ‘Congratulations, you’re doomed!’" (Best Man Speeches)
- "They say a good friend knows all your best stories. A best friend has lived them with you. But today, I promise to keep the embarrassing ones to myself." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "As the father of the bride, I’ve prepared myself for this day for years. I’ve practiced my ‘not tearing up’ face in the mirror, but clearly, I still need more practice." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "Today, I married my best friend. I also married someone who will correct me when I’m wrong and remind me of it when I think I’m right." (Groom Speeches)
- "Here’s to love and laughter and happily ever after." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "I’ve known the groom since we were kids, and I can tell you one thing for sure: he’s not as smart as he looks. Luckily, his bride is here to help him with the hard stuff, like finding his shoes." (Best Man Speeches)
- "Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "When my daughter was little, I told her stories about princesses finding their prince. Today, I get to see her with her very own." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "Marriage is not about finding someone you can live with, but finding someone you can’t live without. And someone who won’t mind putting up with your weird habits." (Groom Speeches)
- "Marriage is like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "The groom and I have been through a lot together. So much, in fact, that when he asked me to be his best man, I couldn’t help but think, ‘Well, this makes up for all the bail money I’ve spent on him.’" (Best Man Speeches)
- "To the bride: I’ve seen you grow from a fun-loving girl to a beautiful woman. And to the groom: Good luck with that." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "They say a daughter may outgrow your lap, but she’ll never outgrow your heart. And a father’s most important job is to keep her husband in line." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "They say a successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. Let’s start our first fall with a honeymoon." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the couple: May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade." (Best Man Speeches)
- "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!" (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To my new son-in-law: Remember, if you ever need a place to hide, you’re always welcome in my basement." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my bride: I knew you were the one when you laughed at my jokes. To everyone else: I’m still working on you." (Groom Speeches)
- "Here’s to the bride who’s found her groom, and to the groom who’s found his doom." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "Here’s to the groom: A man who’s won one woman’s heart and lost so many arguments to get there." (Best Man Speeches)
- "Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves." (Groom Speeches)
- "To love, laughter, and a happily ever after. And if that doesn’t work, here’s to a prenup." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "I asked the groom what he wanted from me today. He said, ‘Just don’t mention that time in Vegas.’ Well, sorry, buddy, I think we all know what happened in Vegas...stays on the internet forever." (Best Man Speeches)
- "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "I promise to always be your biggest fan, your toughest critic, and the one who laughs at your jokes, even the bad ones." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the newlyweds: May your love be like a fine wine, getting better with age." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "They say marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning." (Best Man Speeches)
- "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my wife: You make me a better person every day. And to our guests: Don’t worry, I won’t let her change too much." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the bride and groom: Remember, the secret to a happy marriage remains a secret." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "To the groom: Before you got married, you were incomplete. Now you’re finished." (Best Man Speeches)
- "They say opposites attract. Well, that’s certainly true for the bride and her love of punctuality, and the groom’s love of being fashionably late." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "They say a good marriage is like a casserole: Only those responsible for it really know what goes in it." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "I’ve always believed that a happy wife equals a happy life. Here’s to a lifetime of happiness." (Groom Speeches)
- "Here’s to the bride: May she share everything with her husband, including the housework." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "The groom told me that he’s the boss in his house. And he has his wife’s permission to say so." (Best Man Speeches)
- "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the groom: I’ve been watching you for a while, and I think you’ll make a great husband. Just remember, I’m always watching." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my wife: Thank you for making me the luckiest man in the world. And to our guests: Please drink enough to forget the embarrassing stories you heard today." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the happy couple: May your love be as endless as your wedding speech." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "Here’s to love, laughter, and happily ever after. And if that doesn’t work out, remember: you can always blame the best man for everything." (Best Man Speeches)
- "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!" (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "They say marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning." (Best Man Speeches)
- "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "I promise to always be your biggest fan, your toughest critic, and the one who laughs at your jokes, even the bad ones." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the bride and groom: Remember, the secret to a happy marriage remains a secret." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the bride: I’ve seen you grow from a fun-loving girl to a beautiful woman. And to the groom: Good luck with that." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my new son-in-law: Remember, if you ever need a place to hide, you’re always welcome in my basement." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my bride: You make me a better person every day. And to our guests: Don’t worry, I won’t let her change too much." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "They say a daughter may outgrow your lap, but she’ll never outgrow your heart. And a father’s most important job is to keep her husband in line." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my wife: Thank you for making me the luckiest man in the world. And to our guests: Please drink enough to forget the embarrassing stories you heard today." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the happy couple: May your love be as endless as your wedding speech." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To the bride and groom: Remember, the secret to a happy marriage remains a secret." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "Here’s to the bride: May she share everything with her husband, including the housework." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade." (Best Man Speeches)
- "Here’s to love and laughter and happily ever after." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "They say opposites attract. Well, that’s certainly true for the bride and her love of punctuality, and the groom’s love of being fashionably late." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!" (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the couple: May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "To the groom: Before you got married, you were incomplete. Now you’re finished." (Best Man Speeches)
- "Marriage is not about finding someone you can live with, but finding someone you can’t live without. And someone who won’t mind putting up with your weird habits." (Groom Speeches)
- "To the groom: I’ve been watching you for a while, and I think you’ll make a great husband. Just remember, I’m always watching." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!" (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the bride: I’ve seen you grow from a fun-loving girl to a beautiful woman. And to the groom: Good luck with that." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "Here’s to the bride who’s found her groom, and to the groom who’s found his doom." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "To my wife: You make me a better person every day. And to our guests: Don’t worry, I won’t let her change too much." (Groom Speeches)
- "Marriage is like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "They say marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning." (Best Man Speeches)
- "Here’s to love, laughter, and happily ever after. And if that doesn’t work out, remember: you can always blame the best man for everything." (Best Man Speeches)
- "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves." (Groom Speeches)
- "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." (Maid of Honor Speeches)
- "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree." (Father of the Bride Speeches)
- "Here’s to the bride: May she share everything with her husband, including the housework." (General Wedding Toasts)
- "To the groom: Before you got married, you were incomplete. Now you’re finished." (Best Man Speeches)
- "To my wife: Thank you for making me the luckiest man in the world. And to our guests: Please drink enough to forget the embarrassing stories you heard today." (Groom Speeches)
Top 100 Table¶
Rank | Name | Topic | Tagline |
---|---|---|---|
1 | "Ladies and gentlemen, I’m here to talk about the groom. And since he specifically asked me to keep it short, here’s my speech in three words: ‘Congratulations, you’re doomed!’" | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
2 | "They say a good friend knows all your best stories. A best friend has lived them with you. But today, I promise to keep the embarrassing ones to myself." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
3 | "As the father of the bride, I’ve prepared myself for this day for years. I’ve practiced my ‘not tearing up’ face in the mirror, but clearly, I still need more practice." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
4 | "Today, I married my best friend. I also married someone who will correct me when I’m wrong and remind me of it when I think I’m right." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
5 | "Here’s to love and laughter and happily ever after." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
6 | "I’ve known the groom since we were kids, and I can tell you one thing for sure: he’s not as smart as he looks. Luckily, his bride is here to help him with the hard stuff, like finding his shoes." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
7 | "Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
8 | "When my daughter was little, I told her stories about princesses finding their prince. Today, I get to see her with her very own." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
9 | "Marriage is not about finding someone you can live with, but finding someone you can’t live without. And someone who won’t mind putting up with your weird habits." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
10 | "Marriage is like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
11 | "The groom and I have been through a lot together. So much, in fact, that when he asked me to be his best man, I couldn’t help but think, ‘Well, this makes up for all the bail money I’ve spent on him.’" | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
12 | "To the bride: I’ve seen you grow from a fun-loving girl to a beautiful woman. And to the groom: Good luck with that." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
13 | "They say a daughter may outgrow your lap, but she’ll never outgrow your heart. And a father’s most important job is to keep her husband in line." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
14 | "They say a successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. Let’s start our first fall with a honeymoon." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
15 | "To the couple: May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
16 | "Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
17 | "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!" | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
18 | "To my new son-in-law: Remember, if you ever need a place to hide, you’re always welcome in my basement." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
19 | "To my bride: I knew you were the one when you laughed at my jokes. To everyone else: I’m still working on you." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
20 | "Here’s to the bride who’s found her groom, and to the groom who’s found his doom." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
21 | "Here’s to the groom: A man who’s won one woman’s heart and lost so many arguments to get there." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
22 | "Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
23 | "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
24 | "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
25 | "To love, laughter, and a happily ever after. And if that doesn’t work, here’s to a prenup." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
26 | "I asked the groom what he wanted from me today. He said, ‘Just don’t mention that time in Vegas.’ Well, sorry, buddy, I think we all know what happened in Vegas...stays on the internet forever." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
27 | "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
28 | "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
29 | "I promise to always be your biggest fan, your toughest critic, and the one who laughs at your jokes, even the bad ones." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
30 | "To the newlyweds: May your love be like a fine wine, getting better with age." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
31 | "They say marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
32 | "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
33 | "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
34 | "To my wife: You make me a better person every day. And to our guests: Don’t worry, I won’t let her change too much." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
35 | "To the bride and groom: Remember, the secret to a happy marriage remains a secret." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
36 | "To the groom: Before you got married, you were incomplete. Now you’re finished." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
37 | "They say opposites attract. Well, that’s certainly true for the bride and her love of punctuality, and the groom’s love of being fashionably late." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
38 | "They say a good marriage is like a casserole: Only those responsible for it really know what goes in it." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
39 | "I’ve always believed that a happy wife equals a happy life. Here’s to a lifetime of happiness." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
40 | "Here’s to the bride: May she share everything with her husband, including the housework." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
41 | "The groom told me that he’s the boss in his house. And he has his wife’s permission to say so." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
42 | "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
43 | "To the groom: I’ve been watching you for a while, and I think you’ll make a great husband. Just remember, I’m always watching." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
44 | "To my wife: Thank you for making me the luckiest man in the world. And to our guests: Please drink enough to forget the embarrassing stories you heard today." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
45 | "To the happy couple: May your love be as endless as your wedding speech." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
46 | "Here’s to love, laughter, and happily ever after. And if that doesn’t work out, remember: you can always blame the best man for everything." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
47 | "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!" | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
48 | "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
49 | "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
50 | "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
51 | "They say marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
52 | "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
53 | "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
54 | "To my wife: You make me a better person every day. And to our guests: Don’t worry, I won’t let her change too much." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
55 | "To the bride and groom: Remember, the secret to a happy marriage remains a secret." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
56 | "Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
57 | "To the bride: I’ve seen you grow from a fun-loving girl to a beautiful woman. And to the groom: Good luck with that." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
58 | "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
59 | "To my new son-in-law: Remember, if you ever need a place to hide, you’re always welcome in my basement." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
60 | "To my bride: You make me a better person every day. And to our guests: Don’t worry, I won’t let her change too much." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
61 | "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
62 | "Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
63 | "They say a daughter may outgrow your lap, but she’ll never outgrow your heart. And a father’s most important job is to keep her husband in line." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
64 | "To my wife: Thank you for making me the luckiest man in the world. And to our guests: Please drink enough to forget the embarrassing stories you heard today." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
65 | "To the happy couple: May your love be as endless as your wedding speech." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
66 | "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
67 | "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
68 | "To the bride and groom: Remember, the secret to a happy marriage remains a secret." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
69 | "Here’s to the bride: May she share everything with her husband, including the housework." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
70 | "Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
71 | "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
72 | "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
73 | "Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
74 | "Here’s to love and laughter and happily ever after." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
75 | "They say opposites attract. Well, that’s certainly true for the bride and her love of punctuality, and the groom’s love of being fashionably late." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
76 | "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!" | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
77 | "Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
78 | "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
79 | "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
80 | "To the couple: May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
81 | "To the groom: Before you got married, you were incomplete. Now you’re finished." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
82 | "Marriage is not about finding someone you can live with, but finding someone you can’t live without. And someone who won’t mind putting up with your weird habits." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
83 | "To the groom: I’ve been watching you for a while, and I think you’ll make a great husband. Just remember, I’m always watching." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
84 | "To the bride and groom: May you have a marriage as wonderful and perfect as the bride’s planning of this wedding. No pressure!" | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
85 | "To the bride: I’ve seen you grow from a fun-loving girl to a beautiful woman. And to the groom: Good luck with that." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
86 | "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
87 | "As a father, I always wondered who would be good enough for my daughter. And to be honest, I’m still wondering." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
88 | "To the bride: You’ve always been there for me, through thick and thin. And to the groom: Buckle up, buddy." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
89 | "Here’s to the bride who’s found her groom, and to the groom who’s found his doom." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
90 | "To my wife: You make me a better person every day. And to our guests: Don’t worry, I won’t let her change too much." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
91 | "Marriage is like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
92 | "They say marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
93 | "Here’s to love, laughter, and happily ever after. And if that doesn’t work out, remember: you can always blame the best man for everything." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
94 | "To my new family: Thank you for welcoming me with open arms. And to my wife: Thank you for saying ‘I do’ even after you saw my dance moves." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
95 | "To my daughter: Today, I’m giving you away. And to my son-in-law: Welcome to the family. Good luck, you’ll need it." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
96 | "To the groom: You’re the luckiest man in the world today. Tomorrow, we’ll check back in." | Maid of Honor Speeches | "Celebrating love and friendship with a pinch of humor." |
97 | "To the bride: You’ve always been the apple of my eye. And to the groom: Remember, apples don’t fall far from the tree." | Father of the Bride Speeches | "Sharing wisdom with a dash of humor." |
98 | "Here’s to the bride: May she share everything with her husband, including the housework." | General Wedding Toasts | "Bringing laughter and joy to all." |
99 | "To the groom: Before you got married, you were incomplete. Now you’re finished." | Best Man Speeches | "Roasting the groom, one joke at a time." |
100 | "To my wife: Thank you for making me the luckiest man in the world. And to our guests: Please drink enough to forget the embarrassing stories you heard today." | Groom Speeches | "Making the bride laugh, one joke at a time." |
Conclusion¶
Humor is a great way to make wedding speeches memorable and enjoyable. Whether you are the best man, maid of honor, father of the bride, or the groom, adding a touch of comedy can bring smiles, laughter, and a sense of joy to the special day. Use these funny wedding speeches to inspire your own, and remember, the best speeches come from the heart with a dash of humor.